by Rob Paterson
October 7, 2007 at 12:13 pm
· Filed under Community, Dalhousie University, Social Computing
Here is a typical picture of some friends at a university. One of the great outcomes of time at university is that one leaves not only with a degree but often with a small group of friends that last a lifetime. I was at Dalhousie University last week talking with the team who are responsible for Residence Life there. (Disclosure: I work for Dal) As we talked, we discovered that social software was actually undermining this key process. This was such an aha that I wanted to share it with you and to seek your advice.
I went to Oxford in 1969. I knew maybe 2 people before I arrived and was very nervous about entering the unknown. I was sure that everyone would be cleverer than I was. I was also uncertain about my new found freedom. I had been at a boarding school for boys since the age of 8 and girls were pretty mysterious. But there was no alternative to go out there and find friends. There were no computers. We were far from home of the cities where are school friends lived. Phone was very expensive. We had to dive into the pool of people who were there. I graduated 3 years later with indeed 6 friends who still are close. I am godfather to several of their children. We have buried our parents, gone to our weddings, commiserated over our losses and celebrated our successes. We will probably, at least send presents, to our children’s weddings and we will turn up for our funerals.
These friendships seem to transcend those made later from a shared neighborhood or a shared workplace. University gave us the time to stay up all night and dream with each other. To go on long and mad adventures with each other. To share food with each other for 3 years. To get to know our sisters! There was enough time and space to really get to know each other and no pressure to know someone because it might get us something.
I bet that for most of you, this is your story too. So what did I hear at Dal that caused me to take a step back?
That people don’t have to make friends anymore. That as a result, community is under threat. For what could a place become if those who lived in it don’t care about each other?
So what is happening?
The Iron Rules of Magic Numbers apply to us all. Our circle of intimacy is restricted to between 5-8. When you and I arrived at University, we left behind our “Best Friends” and we had no way of staying in the frequent contact that is essential to maintain the circle. So we created a new one - under such ideal circumstances - close proximity, sharing food, sharing work and adventure for up to 4 years - that we were set ofr life. Others may come in but this group would always be the ideal.
Now imagine todays Freshman. She arrives at Dal or Ohio State also maybe not knowing anyone. BUT her circle of intimacy, already formed at High School, is easily maintained by Facebook, My Space and a host of other social tools. She will have her most intimate circle of 5-8 filled. Why should she invest in strangers? Why should she care about the girl in the next door room even?
It’s not that people are not polite or pleasant. It’s not that friendship is dead. It’s that intimacy is less likely to happen. It is that university loses another key part of its appeal. It’s that keeping order has to rely more on official rules and less on social custom and natural order.
This is surely a huge revolution?
So dear reader, what to do if you are responsible at Dal for creating a Trusted Space where real community can flourish?
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Will that make online universities more appealing for the next generation? Their friends are online, so why not their education?
As for what Dal, and other universities can do - how about appealing to groups of friends, instead of individuals? Bring Your Own Network, may be the new recruiting mantra.
Just musing …
Yes Harold - makes sense
More anyone?
R
You’re missing the corollary also to be found in the post-graduate world: business. Just a couple of weeks ago, the same distinction was noted by a colleague who had been at the company long enough to still have deep ‘remembered’ relationships with people they no longer work with (similar stories of shared personal milestones). The point being that relationships are no longer bound by geographic dimensions.
We worked harder on relationships (work or educational) leveraging different dimensions of commonalities. Now, it is possible to develop deeper intellectual relationships (or whatever dimension of commonality preferred). We simply have more choices and therfore can leverage different possiblities. Our humanness has not lessened, it’s just applied in different ways.
As in the ‘legacy’ model there are likely both positive and less-than-positive elements to be found. Overall, I believe that the geographic boundaries contributed to more ‘closed’ cultures. We see the effect of the minimization of geographic boundaries in significant geopolitical transitions over the past few decades.
Indeed, in watching a recording today of a talk given to University students just last month, a member of NASA shared the significance of geopolitical changes in the space program. In talking about the International Space Station it was shared how, from the space station, they all point back to the same location to identify “where they’re from”.
Suw wrote @ October 9th, 2007 at 4:39 am
Overall, I think the ability to maintain relationships over previously difficult geographical distances is a positive thing, and I can imagine than being able to keep in touch with school friends whilst at university may remove some of the fear of having to deal with a new place, new people, new demands because you know that someone you trust is going through the same thing and you can share that experience.
But social networks have never been and never will be a full replacement for offline interaction. Indeed, shortly after I started blogging five years ago, I started meeting up with my fellow bloggers. Online interactions are valuable, but they aren’t quite as much fun as getting out of the house and doing stuff with other people. Maybe Facebook is slowing down the process of students getting out and getting to know each other, but the flip side of that is that perhaps it also makes it less intimidating?
And if you are concerned that students are becoming too withdrawn, then perhaps focusing on drawing them out to offline events, and on face-to-face collaboration on their studies would go some way to redress the balance. Then use social software to perpetuate, solidify and enhance these new relationships.
I do want to say, though, that the experience of university you described isn’t necessarily the experience every student will have. My university years were three of the most lousy, unhappy and alienating years of my life, and I was glad to be shot of them. I’d have loved to have had some sort of way to keep in touch with friends from home, but those relationships atrophied quickly because I hardly ever saw them - even during holidays, because I was on compulsory field trips. For any student going through that sort of experience, Facebook would be a godsend.
While the concept makes sense, I don’t know if it necessarily spells doom for universities. They will certainly need to pay attention to what their (aggregate) students are doing with online social nets, but they still need to provide places for people to gather for homework, study breaks, eating and drinking. And these are exactly the kinds of places that people need to collect and find one another. Sure, some will hole up with their BFF’s from primary school, but there are many who prefer the physical connection with their colleagues. It’s one reason I like to go hang out at coffee shops, even when working alone.
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